How far is too far? Gender nonconformity.

I was on Facebook when I saw this image:

gendernonconform

Very cute kid with what I think is a fashionable taste in shoes, but here lies the issue with me.

He’s five. Only five years old right now and how is he going to feel when he’s ten or twelve or sixteen and has pictures of him wearing pink shoes?

I guess this stems from my own personal problem because when I was young, we were allowed to dress ourselves before I would ever begin to let a child truly pick their own clothes out. Now with Emma, Alice’s daughter, she is three and I always let her pick out her clothes, but I guide her. I’ll let her choose the pants, skirt, or shorts she wants and then I let her point to which shirt she desires, but if it doesn’t match I tell her and she’ll point to another one.

I have a picture, I wish I could share with you, that I hate from when I was about six or seven years of age. There was this horrible outfit I loved to wear and my mom fucking let me. It was a bright yellow shirt with a toucan and I wore shiny neon pink skimps (leggings is what they can be referred to nowadays) and this picture is me posing all sassy like and it’s horrible. I hate that picture.

I’m on the fence with gender nonconformity. Half of me is for it, the other half is a bit more hesitant. Kids constantly are changing, they don’t have a true identity to conform to until they’re of a certain age. What Sam likes now, Sam may hate tomorrow. And that’s cool, but I think the parents should guide their decisions a bit because they only are kids.

Now for Sam, his mother at the store did tell him that the shoes were originally made for a little girl in mind and Sam didn’t care. He’s a ninja and to him ninjas can wear pink if they like. He went to preschool proudly and only got positive remarks from his peers and teachers. And I am grateful for that because the reality is what makes me hesitant about gender nonconformity is the possible bullying and the possible regret of, “MOM! why would you let me wear that???”

I’m not a parent, but it has me questioning as a parent where do you draw the line? How is it decided when they should be able to make their own choices and when you need to step in?

Fill me in all you parents out there. I’m curious to know. And I also want everyone’s thoughts on gender nonconformity. Go!

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He Must Think I’m Stupid

Oh the joys of the drama when it comes to these manboys I seem to pick out.

Last night I got bored and when I get bored, I get curiously mischievous. I decided to create a fake account on Plenty of Fish and investigate if Tommy ever took his profile down like he said.

Fast forward through 20 minutes of searching and bam! there he is.

He not only had one, but it was new. Different screen name, newly updated information, the works.

I became mad. Which is hard to do when you’re on the drug cocktail I am on.

I texted him this: Look it’s one thing to be on pof, it’s another to update your profile. I hope you find your country girl.

He called me about 10 minutes later and came up with the fact that he had been drinking when he did it and he was sorry. And that he also hadn’t talked to anyone on there.

He said he’s take it down when he got off work. He got off at 3 in the morning, it’s almost 12 now and it’s still up. I did tell him he could keep it if he wanted, I wasn’t going to be the one to make him do anything. He insisted though that he was going to take it down.

On a side note I don’t think I’ve met anyone that apologizes as much as him. Usually the guys I date it’s like pulling teeth to get them to admit to anything they did wrong.

Simply put, I am annoyed.

The End.

Is it me or them? I’m not so sure.

I like Tommy. He’s funny and nice, some of the time, and we have really only been hanging out a week and a couple of days, but something is off.

I understand now he is stressed about some things, and the stress will be short-lived, but him acting like a jerk to me is pissing me off.

He apologizes for it, but the behavior doesn’t change.

He also carries some baggage as he recently got out of a 2 year relationship just a couple of months ago. I didn’t know it’d only been that short of a time period.

I don’t know. We don’t really have much in common either. He listens to country, I listen to rock and hip-hop. He likes playing video games, I don’t. I like to go out and do things, he’d rather relax in home. He likes movies like Robocop and Ninja Turtles, and I like stuff like The Labyrinth and Sex Tape — which I am so watching today. It better be as funny as it seems. (Please, if you’ve seen it, don’t tell me.)

And I am not saying I dislike Robocop or Ninja Turtles, I like them both, but where as I am willing to watch them with him, he won’t budge to watch a film I’d like to watch with me.

He believes I think too much, I think he thinks too little. What was cute with him before, such as the lack of understanding of my vocabulary, is now becoming a hindrance.

He has a 6th grade education, I have an associates. I plan on going into Pharmacy school, I don’t know his plans really.